Relief came when he left. That sounds awful. But I could breath again. I could focus on doing this.. getting through the day and the next and the next. I dried tears from my precious girl. I listened over and over as my baby said he wanted Daddy. And I've tried to figure out what exactly my oldest needs as I don't fully recognize him right now. I've answered with a smile that "We are doing fine and getting into a routine." I've stayed up way too late night after night trying to get done what I can't seem to ever catch up on. I've had sick kids wake up right when I was going to bed, of course. I've had fun (yes!) with amazing friends..
It has been 2 weeks.
I think the time of year is making it harder.. I honestly have a hard time enjoying this time of year anyway so this just doesn't help! I recently said "I'm barely keeping my head above water." then I laughed and said "Wait no.. I'm not even above.. I'm using a snorkel!" That silly little comment has floated through my head many times.. I guess I like examples that I can picture! And me with a snorkel is pretty funny. But.. It means I'm doing it!!! And that makes me want to keep going.
"I am holding on to you. I am holding on to you. In the middle of the storm, I am holding on. I am.
This is my resurrection song. This is my hallelujah call. This is why it's to You I run."
These are lyrics from a new song by David Crowder called "I Am". … My storm. I am holding on to the only "snorkel" that will get me through. (Did i just compare God to a snorkel??!) I guess I did. My anthem will ring out and I will try to keep my head above water.. or be happy to stay underneath and accept grace for all the things I can't do alone.
An equally awesome song is "Overcomer" by Mandisa. The kids chose this song as their deployment song. Talk about one to bust out loud!!! And man, Addie does on her iPod with headphones on.. it's awesome! "You're an overcomer… stayin to fight to the final round. You're not goin under.. cuz God is holding you right now. You might be down for a moment feeling like it's hopeless.. but that's when He reminds you.. You're an overcomer!" It was so cute, we picked up a friend who's husband just left to take her out for ice cream.. and Garrett cued up this song for her!
So yeah, it's been 2 weeks of ups and downs.. but I Am saying now that we are Overcomers!!!
Wanna hear these songs??
